My Dancing Queen


It is hard for me to start this post. I still look at the illustration Saby did for me and I am speechless. Take away the beautifully detailed regalia, flowing hair, perfect lips and look in those eyes? Saby brought the twinkle I wanted for this character…you can see a beautiful life in her gaze. This is what it means to love your character so much that you can describe to an illustrator whose first language is Italian and lives 14 hours away in a different country yet still she gets it.

On to WHO this amazing character is.

Her name is Winona Andersen

She is the ex-wife/love/the only to Major Chase Andersen.

Winona is of the Navajo nation. She is a strong woman in love with a very complicated man. She is a mother, dancer, poet, sister and daughter. Spending her days taking care of ailing parents, Winona devotes her nights writing poetry. She knows leaving Chase was the best for her small son and daughter, because sometimes love isn’t enough and intense passion can turn anyone into someone they aren’t.

Read about her in Volume 2: Chasing Dreams

Winona’s words

They call it a broken heart, but it’s our mind telling us to feel that stinging hurt in our chest, deep in our gut and somehow making us choke. Why didn’t that same brain say no and save me the torture.

I heard about you I knew your deal, all the women, trails of affection and admiration. Yet when you looked at me with those maddeningly gorgeous brown eyes, I was the only one, in a crowd of a million. Time stopped, it was over…fate slaughtered knowledge.  -Winona Andersen

Constant Moon

There are many myths about the moon.

Werewolves come to life, singing to her.

Or two lovers punished to spend eternity apart. Only touching at dawn and dusk when horizons can disappear.

My moon is the one he sees.

The one my love sleeps under.

Where he prays.

Watching him fight.

It makes me wonder if you’re thinking of me staring at the moon…

Can I count on you? I say to the moon, will you be there?

Or will I be played a fool…

I stare at the moon, this constant thing.

Is my heart too fond of you? Do I need to let you go?

Tragic love…

I am the forlorn lover that only feels your touch when hidden behind the horizon.

Always waiting, always willing.

Tell me my love, are you so willing?

I am the sad constant moon.


“I Am but a Vessel”

I am a true vessel, but much more.

Over centuries men have staked claim.

In my womb I continue your bloodline.

My breasts nurture, the reason mankind will survive.

Intelligence, patience, virtue, passion and strength I bestow to your progeny.

The balance between love and hate can tilt or poof…disappear.

I continue to be beaten down, only to lift my head once again.

My vision is clear, to emphatically create something out of love even if that love is just imagined.

Short lived, left to survive in the shadows of once was.

My arms support you, while my hands caress the most tender part of your soul.

In your eyes I am weaker, I can’t be trusted. The emotions you count on in private, get in your way standing before a jury of peers.

They call me mother, giver of life 


The Other Man…Helena and Murray


Here is Detective Murray Ross

He is the fiancé of Helena in Volume 1: Creation of Creed. Murray is a smart cop turned Detective after a run in with drug dealing scum. He grew up in the suburb that he currently lives in yet  protects the city of Cleveland. Murray feels he is a member of the socially elite, which causes issues and is a reason he got that scar under his eye. Eye for an Eye they say

The love triangle he is caught up in will change Murray…find out how.

Poetry Friday…it can be a thing.

Part-time Love

You feel the sting exponentially.

The touch of fingertips, soft lips, stained on the body.

Close your eyes and perceive possessive breath.

A voice echos in your heart, splitting your soul.

You were shown the light, can you go back…do you want to?

Dreams replaced your reality, now reality is overwhelmed by your dreams.

No turning back, no daylight savings. Not that you’d want to.

The memory of smell stops you in your path.

Heartbeats so loud, you look around knowing everyone stopped to stare.

Oh Lord the hair….Exhale.

50 Shades of Gray…My Take


The reasons I like the movie far out weigh what I don’t.

Reason 1. This shows women who are not so excited about sex,  what IT can do for THEM.

Reason 2. Conversations about what a couple may like. Change is good, exploration is even better.

Reason 3. It sheds light on the submissive/dominant relationship. Anastasia is not a dumb or weak woman. To submit is to enjoy the pleasure a dominant provides, it does not mean that a woman gets beat up or is scared. If a submissive is scared the dominant is doing it wrong. It is about anticipation…

Reason 4. Portland to Seattle, yes please…I want to bike that, drive that, helicopter that, whatever. That area is not showcased enough. Simply majestic

Reason 5. I am a constant romantic

Reason 1. It is 2015, who has a flip phone? We also have razors, waxing even laser hair removal. Why does this girl in her twenties have so much hair? If she likes it there ok, but I get the feeling they purposely made her seem naive which wasn’t needed.

Reason 2. Although a man grabbing a woman and saying seductively “You Are Mine” is outrageously sexy. Mr. Gray seemed to find his way to stage 5 clinger a few to many times.

Dakota Johnson is hot and Jamie Dornan is hot. It is entertainment, take it for what it is worth, but I am excited that erotic liturature is in the mainstream. Expect to see a baby boom in October.

Can you poop in Heaven?


My daughter is going to PSR, a catholics answer to a child not going to private school. An after school program that teaches young impressionable children about the ways of the catholic faith. I am a catholic drop out, but you know it always seems to run through your veins. I was a religion nerd and decided that no matter what, a person needs to experience other religions. Study about paganism, everyone should be required to see a true Baptist worship, realize the influence of the Creator and get acquainted with Martin Luther. In doing so I gained respect for their struggles and the beauty of faith. I truly love religion, but moreover faith is my motivator. I did decide to raise my  children as catholics. Maybe because it was comfortable but also because I travelled to Rome and felt the power of Vatican city. Watched as Pope Benedict spoke in Latin to thousands of his faithful, the energy is overwhelming and he isn’t even the good Pope! To see where the bones of St. Peter lie (which could be chicken bones, but who would care it is symbolic) and I cried when I saw the Sistine Chapel, mind you it is one of the most iconic works of art in existence, but it is the story of Adam’s creation down to the Last Judgement, which was my favorite part.

That brings me back to my daughter and PSR. She asked me “Mommy my religion teacher taught me how the world was created.” “Oh yeah? How?” I questioned. She repeated the biblical story of how God created the world in 6 days and the last day he rested. Que mom…I let her know that the bible, although wonderful in teaching lessons was written thousands of years later, by very privileged men. We also spoke about evolution and the big bang theory…basically how science is a very real and undisputed reason why the earth is what it is and how we as humans evolved. I ended my discussion with, ” It is always good to question, it will not affect your faith.”    

My girls will believe what they want, I just want them to have all the information before they decide. As the parent you cannot and should not let your children be dictated by a singular person. Teachers are the least appreciated profession hands down for what they control in society, so teaching with them is very important.

My daughter’s next question was just as pivotal as the discussion we just had. “Mom, I was thinking about it and I need to know.” I was on top of it, ready to use that $75,000 education. “Yes, baby?” I answered. She looked right at me with big brown eyes, “Does God have bathrooms in heaven, because I’m going to need somewhere to poop.”

Good fucking question Gianna, good question.

A Refined look at Creed


Dezmond Creed started my series and will end it. He is hope…

I wrote about Creed several times, who he is an what he can accomplish. I now have an extremely talented illustrator creating my characters exactly how I want them. Please take a look at previous posts about Captain Dezmond Creed…my big teddy bear.